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QUINCEAN~ERAS,  BAR and BAT MITZVAHS

BAR AND BAT MITZVAHS —  Learn as I did, if nothing else, one thing in this chapter. The word upfront, first page, “ Find the stick".  You treat the Bar or Bat Mitzvah exactly the same way as a Wedding. Especially Bar-Mitzvahs, the boys get a little rowdier and you’ll have a larger percentage of kids around who think a little more chaos is fun as they are not as structured sometimes with their parents not there.

The other thing you will learn as you read on is something I mentioned before. Find out whose running the gig and who is ultimately responsible. I really went against everything I teach and it taught me a harsh lesson. Honestly I have been blessed this is the only job in five decades I really had a fight over, and lost my cool on.

THE BAR MITZVAH THAT I SCREWED UP —  

I knew the person I thought was the host, a friend of my mother, so I never bothered with a contract. No substantial deposit, just $100 for film, she said, “ She was treating for the film”. It was her sister’s grandson. I was not dealing with the boss, ( Violation of rule one). No contract ( Violation of Rule Two).

One of the other guests a sister attending was on an unsupervised weekend leave from a Mental Institution on Long Island, NY.  I am not joking about this as it’s not something I would joke about. I’ve dealt with enough people with various Dementia, Alzheimer’s, and Vascular Dementia.

She got enamored with the camera and upset every picture she could get into. Funny faces, devil fingers, the birdie. I asked the mother to see if she could calm her a little and I got a speech. Not her job, “Let her have fun”. No designated persona (Violation of Rule Three) 

Uncle Samuel brought his Minolta SRT 01 and almost knocked me over.  I did not know the sister in law had insisted he did. No Contract stipulating prime shooter (Violation of Rule Four)

Then the rest of the Paparazzi showed up. It ran long, kids got restless and they headed for the banquet. Even the Rabbi was trying to bail. And the real party for the adults was on the second (next) day which I was never told about. (Violation of Rules 5-7, no contract, no outsiders, time stipulation, Paparazzi under my control etc

What should have been in those days was a fifteen-hundred-dollar job reduced to the 400 I quoted for the one day... I just wanted to get it done, over with and learned a valuable lesson. I did the work in our lab and told her (Moms friend) the proofs were ready. I wanted this thing done. Gut feeling.

All of a sudden, she has nothing to do with this entire affair.  OK I reach the other fly-in sister, the step mother. She tells me to forget it as (you guessed it) Uncle Samuel had done such a good job! Really? The two had not coordinated and my services were no longer required. (Rules 2,3,4,5,6-37) 

Here I am, ticked off looking at 6-36 exposure rolls of 35. I called my attorney, basically he tells me, I got borscht! It usually boils down to what’s in writing. New rule, no friends shoots. Or as he said it, “NO WRITE, NO RIGHT! He felt it was not worth pursuing. He instructs me to send them a registered letter telling them all the negatives and proofs will be unavailable if not paid for and picked up (or destroyed) within 48 hours.

Since they voided the verbal agreement. He calls the witch as a last resort, and she tells him where to go. I am not generally a vengeful person, but this one got to me and a week later after repeated calls, I sliced and diced the prints and negatives in my new criss-cross paper shredder with the proofs and dumped the trash. Almost ruined the machine. It was little consolation and stupid to do so. (Rule six)

DIVINE INTERVENTION (BLUE WORDS)  --

But if ever there was Divine Intervention, G-d the almighty, user of burning bushes and synch cords sent a plague through Uncle Samuel’s Minolta on a shutter speed (over 250) too high for the flash which only synched at 1/80 or 1/125. You probably did it one time or another, each picture was a half frame and people cut off, not one useful print since the Bar Mitzvah by was dead center in all shots and now had half a face. Revenge is mine saith the Lord!

Uncle Samuel, you know him as Uncle Fred, blew the synch speed rule! He had pictures, but only one-half of each of them. I get a call a couple a couple of weeks later from Uncle Samuel suddenly my new best friend, he needed the pics to save face.  And I told him to shove the Minolta in the exit tunnel for his alimentary canal, the opposite end of the face he was going to save and take the bitch with him. I lost it…. I told him they were destroyed.

Then the bitch herself called me and she was as nice as the sun rising on a summer morn with birds chirping and I pleasantly told her I did not have any of the pictures and there was nothing I could do. She had her chance and now she has no one to blame but herself. She called me every name under the sun...

DIVINE GUIDANCE

The next call I got was from the real Dad, not the poor bastard married to her now.  Sorry, nothing I could do.  He turns out to be a real nice guy.  he flew down  We had lunch, he was down here from NY for a week. I lost, they lost. And this meant a lot for the real Dad and the Kid 

It was a treasured moment with their child that went unrecorded that was the bad part, it bothered me. I wrote this off as an experience and that’s why I’m telling you how you must approach this thing as a business and forsake the amateur attitude if you are serious about making this a career.

Had I been professional and not lost my temper, I would have put a REAL HEALTHY price tag on the pictures. One of those D4X price tags. But it bothered me. I have a heart under all this humor.... I called the father back and told him when he came down and picked up his kid and we were going to a plan a few places to reshoot what I could, inexpensively.

I knew the Rabbi and asked to borrow the Temple and a few friends of the kid, I shot some really good stuff portrait work in the temple. On the beach, Khakis, blue shirts, Sea Oats, sand, at a pitch and putt, Busch Gardens, batting cages, deep sea fishing and handed him 140 plus portrait quality shots of Dad and Son with friends that hopefully the way the real father would have really wanted it. The dad treated the kid and his friends to three great days and I shot all of it.

Time to leave, the father had to go to the airport, he was going home, I took him and when I dropped him off, he handed me an envelope. He told me to open it when I got home. He paid me triple in cash for what I had originally charged for the Bar Mitzvah. I called him in NY and joked with him after I saw the generosity and his comment was, “Now, you know why I am not married to her, and I feel sorry for the jerk she married”. The best part is none of her, her family, the whole crew is not in any of my son’s pictures. It’s just him and me and when he turns 16 he’ll come to live with me, till then I have great shots, that's the best part.

Quinceañera   —  A feminine form of "fifteen-year-old"), also called fiesta de quince años, fiesta de quinceañera, quince años or simply quince, is the celebration of a girl's fifteenth birthday in parts of Latin America and elsewhere in communities of people from Latin America. This birthday is celebrated differently from any other as it marks the transition from childhood to young womanhood.The celebration, however, varies significantly across countries, with celebrations in some countries taking on, for example, more religious overtones than in others.

IN BRAZIL  —  a Portuguese-speaking country, the same celebration is called festa de debutantes, baile de debutantes or festa de quinze anos. In the French Caribbean and French Guiana, it is called fête des quinze ans.

UNITED STATES VERSION   - IN the United States the tradition of La Quinceañera, also known as the XV, has been adopted primarily in cities with an extensive Hispanic population. 

THE Here’s one we’ll discuss. Latin American people celebrate the 15th birthday of a young lady. It’s her coming of age. Similar to Jewish tradition when a young man of 13 enters into the community thorough a ceremony called a Bar Mitzvah. For young Jewish girls it’s called a Bat Mitzvah.

Like Weddings, both societies celebrate from the old days the entry of the young man or lady into the circle of adults in their society with expectations of them performing as adults and leaving childhood behind. And the extreme to which they will go is about as diverse as a Wedding depending on their financial plateau. 

I know of two photographers who have covered some very expensive twenty-four thousand dollar Quinceañera parties and I have seen and attending Bat Mitzvahs which have exceeded that. And they got into them because they're Wedding business dropped off.  One in particular spent a year learning the Spanish Language on Rosetta Stone and has a Spanish speaking second shooter who helped build a year round business. Not just wedding seasons, last time I checked there is no baby season, like June weddings, kids pop out 24/7/365.

Now think of the opportunities here in photographing a Quinceañera. Let’s explore what it is and how we adapt. To avoid confusion another similar term is "Quinceaños". This refers to the birthday of the celebrant. Break it up into Quince (15) Anos (Years). Quinceañera’s refers to the celebrant.

• The planning for the quinceañera starts 6 to 18 months in advance. The ceremony and venue determine the date of the event. The parents of the quinceañera will look for sponsors (or padrinos) to help with the expense associated with the event.  
• After securing the venue for the reception and the church for the ceremony, a musical group (El grupo) and a photographer must also be reserved. In New York there are boutiques that specialize in renting the chamberlains for the event.
• Gap filler - Adding Quinceañera’s to your Wedding days that are open or on days you normally don’t do Weddings like Friday evenings and Sundays.
• No stranger in Church - The services at the Church generally are shorter and sweet, sometimes without a Mass and less restrictive on flash. Priests generally keep it that way, similar to a Baptismal. Of course we do have exceptions and you know you are in trouble when he starts off with the The Reading of the Gospels of Everybody and Last year’s Unabridged Version of the Phone book.
• New Territory - Another critical point is opening new territory. Kids have friends at other schools both public and secular. Kids have cousins and they will be at the party. In some ways there are more opportunities here than at a Wedding and less hassles.
• No Time Limits - The young lady has friends and guaranteed they might have a birthday coming up within a two year span for several reasons such as age difference. Girls are more flexible than the guys as to friends age and some of the girls may or may not be Latino. That’s another point, if they don’t have Quince Ano’s Party then they sure will have a Sweet Sixteen, so that adds a year and more possibilities and or Bar(T) Mitzvahs.
•  Again there is no season based on the sexual habits of 350,000,000 people in the US.  We have deducted that kids are born year round and there is no season.  No rushes during June and November.
• Whereas the Spanish ceremony is rooted in the Church, the Sweet Sixteen is rooted in popularity and usually that can work for you. The popular gal has a lot of friends and followers, and the not so popular gal is trying to break into the scheme of things.
• Today's celebrations embrace religious customs, and the virtues of family and social responsibility. The Quinceanera tradition celebrates the young girl (la Quinceanera), and recognizes her journey from childhood to maturity. The customs highlight God, family, friends, music, food, and dance.  Interestingly, many families today are merging their Hispanic and American heritages by choosing to celebrate a Sweet Sixteen. 
• For their Sweet 16 party, the families do the full-blown quinceanera traditions - the religious ceremony, the reception, the tiara with the number 16, and more. We encourage families to select the customs that have special meaning to them and to add to the customs as they wish. That is what makes the celebration unique and very special.
•  In the Mexican, Puerto Rican, Cuban, Central and South American traditions, the custom can be referred to as a Quince (XV) Años a Quinces, a Quinceanera,  or a Fiesta Rosa.
• The Quinceanera celebration traditionally begins with a religious ceremony. A Reception is held in the home or a banquet hall. The festivities include food and music, and in most, a choreographed waltz or dance performed by the Quinceanera and her Court.
• It is traditional for the Quinceanera to choose special friends to participate in what is called the Court of Honor. Usually, these young people are her closest friends, her brothers, sisters, cousins - the special people in her life with whom she wants to share the spotlight. The Quinceanera's Court of Honor can be comprised of all young girls (called Dama), all young men (called Chambelán or Escorte or Galán) or a combination of both.
• The Quinceanera traditionally wears a ball gown, with her Court dressed in gowns and tuxedos. Guests usually receive small tokens, cápias and cerámicas, to commemorate the celebration.

DIVERSIFICATION IS THE KEY  —  
I know I will be doing additional sections on Seniors, Quinceañera's, Bar Mitzvahs, and Confirmations.  Then we will delve into Corporate and Business Photography.  In conclusion, alternate choices using the tools you have, survival in this day and age means simply put: be diverse, think out of the box, look for new territory, expand your horizons and start wearing boxer shorts with patterns and color.

Think about it. All the above topics are about either “coming out” or "going into" a community or for communication with a community in the case of business photography. There is business there for the smart one. And it's not surprising when I wrote to be successful in this business you need a split personality.  Not just a shooter but a business person.