CHAPTER THREE - The Detention, Escape and War



DETENTION, DECLARING WAR and ABSOLUTION
CHAPTER THREE 


MY SUCCESS AT DETENTION 
Many times I was sent to detention, I relished it, for several reasons. Most of what was being discussed in class was the equivalent of being offered a band-aid when you sliced off your finger, the teacher was boring or a stuffed shirt, and the information being distributed was not accurate, of relativity nor scientifically correct.

Instead of going to detention, I signed in, pulled the bathroom trick, vanished  and sneaked out to my favorite places the work shops.  Teachers handling or tagged for detention were pre-occupied scoring tests, and other “ teacherly” duties, they never missed me once, as I snuck back in and signed out at the end of the period. I used a kitchen food timer.   We had a wood shop and a metal shop. I found an oldie pic of the wood shop but nothing in the metal shop.  

I loved my shop classes, they taught me fundamentals of creativity, functuality, and turning ideas, from thoughts to products of metal and wood.   From concept to completion.  Traits I use even today and almost every day of my life.  I thought, designed, built, crafted, created, tools, devices and gadgets for the common good, and some questionable devices.   Read On.


BEGINNING TO THE END OF HIGH SCHOOL
George W. Wingate High School as a High School is now defunct.  I was in the first classes to graduate though my marks in English were only securely passing like a B-, but not of merit.  My fear was having to do English over since we ( the teacher and I ) did not agree on many things. 

Her fear, I think if she failed me, she would get me back again.  I had to learn to sit still and smile.  I gave her the Aldred E. Neuman smile.  I think I drove her nuts.  

Math, the sciences, shops, government and history studies, I did well, got along great with the teachers, who worked with me, except for one other.  You’ll soon meet my Science teacher, my new enemy and the ensuing battle it created.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 


SPORTS
Basketball, the schools only real sport besides tiddlywinks, smoking and MJ dubbies, developed a great player.   Roger Brown  6’5” made the pros, played for the Pacers and a few others, and against Connie Hawkins from Boys High, our major competitor in the city.  I recently found out both Roger Brown and Connie Hawkins (who played with the Harlem Globetrotter Exhibition Team) both passed away.  I liked them both, they were cool when cool meant something.  I played one-on-one with Roger one day and lost 54 to 0. At 6.5” he never dunked with 3.5 arms he just dropped it in.

Both were denied college scholarships because they were banned from the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA) and National Basketball Association (NBA) when it was revealed that while still in High School they had been introduced to a gambler, Jack Molinas, who was involved in illegal point shaving.  Brown was never accused of point shaving, neither was Connie and the only crime was knowing him or of him.  So he tried out and made the pros.

I am still a devout history nut but embarrassed by todays standards of education as history is not as relevant. Passing SAT tests by any means possible and turning out idiots is not my idea of education.  My regrets are politics, politicians, cheats , liars and scumbags who do not support the children and teachers. High on todays list are T-RUMP and DeVOS who haven’t a clue nor concern.


UNDERSTANDING MY TRUANCY
In school, the main subject I excelled in was truancy, my favorite hangouts while cutting class were all of the museums, The Museam of Natural History,  Modern Art,  the huge library in Manhattan, I visited all  the Zoos, from Prospect Park to the Bronx Zoo.  Ebbets Field, Home of the Dodgers five blocks from my house, the National Parks like the Statue of Liberty, and my home away from home the library and the shops.

Wingate was not teaching me anything I hadn’t learned on my own, I was stagnant being there. There was a beautiful world at my fingertips and the challenge was having the chutzpah to take advantage of.   I lived in the library at school, and my home at the City Library at Eastern Parkway and Schenectady Ave, the truancy police never thought to find me there, it had great hiding spots behind staircases,  I did get caught once at the Museam of Art and was reported. 

College was better than high school because you were on your own, I manage better that way.  They tell me thats how I write, unmanageable.  I make no claims as a writer.  I am a story teller.  GEORGE W. WINGATE HS which Is responsible for the skills I have today which I credit to my English and Science teachers hatred of me.  They taught me to fight for whats right and they were wrong and in two instances I won.

 

THINGS THAT CHANGE WHEN YOU GROW UP

I hated Poetry, English class, my Teacher, and Shakespeare in that order.  She was talking Animal farm by Orwell and Lord of the Flies, and I had read it both two years prior.  Our Science teacher was another winner, a Bible Babbler pushing the Big Bang theory.   

Being a rebel I preferred reading Popular Science, Pop Mechanics, Aviation News, even Greggs Anatomy and Lord of the Rings by J. R. R. Tolkien first written in 1954.  

Blurting out, me bad, I slipped and referring to Shakespeare as “ Snake-sh*it”  put me on the snake-sh*t-list.  I did not make things easier… especially when I said,  
“ Who cares, he was dead and good riddance”.  

Which led for her to scream “ Off to detention”.  My wise mouth retorted with 
“ Off with his head”.  I was thrown into detention so many times I thought they were going to get a directors chair with a my name on the back. 

She had no love for me.  She once commented to my parents, (at the annual mother-teacher day): “ We as a family should move to France and Alan can study English as a foreign language”.  It was a good line but....

That was a declaration of war!  Rank on me but don’t ever speak against my parents...

For the end of term exam we had to read aloud to the class ( supposedly with emotion) any one page from anything Shakespeare wrote.   Part two was to compose a poem of your choice and something you experienced.  Great thought went into this one.  This was going to be rich...


REVENGE ONE  - THE BOOK REPORT: 

I chose Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar and got in trouble reading a certain passage out loud.  Like Julius Caesar being offered a  relationship by Brutus on one occasion after returning from the wars and after he challenged Brutus’s loyalty.  In those days “ Mano un Mano encounters were common”   

Brutus offered his oral services to prove his loyalty.  Our teacher wasn’t fond of Blow-Job Politics so common today.   OOOps, off to detention.  Got five stars in laughs from the class though.  Then before she could realize what had and was happening, I dedicated my first ever poem to her:

PART ONE

SHAKESPEARE DOTH NOT A GENIUS MAKE, 
FOR HE SPAKE IN TERMS REMINISCENT OF A FLAKE,
HIS METER, I FIND HURTS MY EARS, HIS STORIES I FIND, BRING ME TO TEARS, 

AND ALL THOSE MARKS OF SELECTIVE PUNCTUATION, BRING ME...  ALAS NO RESERVATION,
MY RUN-ON SENTENCES PROVIDE ME WITH EXPRESSION,  I AM A STORY TELLER
NOT A CRITIQUER OF USELESS FICTIONAL BORING BEST SELLERS
AND YOUR CLASSES FRANKLY ARE QUITE BORING...   
THUS THE ABUNDANCE OF HIGH OCTAVE SNORING”

Standing ovation and cheering for my performance.   Before that I never wrote a line of prose in my life, but times change and there are times you step up to the pump... Truthfully, today I’m finding it, somewhat  interesting, and relaxing.  In fact I compare writing prose to crossword puzzles, you are putting things together.   In fact later,  a couple years ago, reminiscing I expanded my origional poem with an update that I’m happy with.


PART TWO

I WRITE AS I SPEAK, MY WORKS REFLECT WHAT I SEEK,
BE IT RELIGION, FOOD, OR POLITICAL, MY REPORTS CAN BE QUITE CRITICAL
I SEEK AND EMBELLISH THE UNCOUTH, WHEN SEEKING THE REALITY OF TRUTH,
THERE ARE SOME DOORS THAT I WILL HAVE TO SMASH OPEN, 
AND THE WORDS WILL APPEAR UNBROKEN,
FOR THE LIARS, CHEATERS AND CROOKS, BRINGING IT OUT IS MY QUEST,
AND WHEN IT BECOMES VERY REAL, FOR ME THAT IS THE BEST OF BEST
AND I WILL BRING IT FORTH TO THE TOP OF THE HEAP,
FEARING NO ONE, NO MAN, NO BEAST, NO CREEP...



REVENGE II - THE SCIENCE PROJECT

The second bad encounter was the Earth Science teacher, I lived my life as numero uno on the hooky list at the Museam of Natural History in NYC.  About  a forty minute train ride from Utica Ave and a Mecca of the Science of Evolution.  Not the story I was getting from the pro Bible Babble teacher.  

She was an Adam and Eve, snakes and ribs, the Big Bang Bullshit theory, and how the caveman killed off the Dinosaurs.   And thought it carried the same legitimacy as Darwin.  Not in my noodle!  When she turned her back I said to one of my sidekicks across the room, “ What a crock of shit”.  She heard me and I was “ Off to detention”.  Still no chair, I was disappointed and neglected.  I went to detention and continued reading Greggs Anatomy, which weighed as much as I did. 

I had spent many weekend days in the Dinosaur area of the Museam of Natural History.  I literally wrote the tenth grade hooky thesis as a project on Darwin, Evolution, the Earths time line from days at the museam and asking enough questions to have the curator there who realized I had a passion for the Jurassic era.
“ I asked if I could be a volunteer at 16 as a teen guide during the summer times in the Dinosaur exhibit”, I was accepted, I even got a parental pass for the school to OK me to be there.  Needed in NY if under sixteen at that time.   Then I got called to the Deans office.


THE CHALLENGE OF THE DEANERY
Well, the participants were discussing, I was listening.   It included the Bible Babel teacher, my parents, the Dean of Boys, a neutral adult student representative ( like my lawyer) and I had enough!  I asked permission to speak.  I said since this concerns me, I would like to defend myself.  They all weren’t ready for that, including my mother.  But I stood my ground.

I placed on the table my “ Thesis”.  It was purely a voluntary piece of work on the Dinosaurs.  It was college level hand typed,  as the girls in detention could type better than me, and helped me,  organized with pictures I took at the museam,  time charts and did my abbreviated twenty minute explanation of truth about the: 
Triassic period: 250–200 million years ago, 
Jurassic period: 200–145 million years ago  
Cretaceous period: 145–65 million years ago  
MAN Walked up on the scene: Two million years ago with a stick and a rock.  Even today,  Biblical Babelistic Bullshiters  push the falsehoods. Just think, how did man who has been on the earth 
less that two million years  just happen to love Pterodactyl wings in hot sauce barely 65 million years old, Ans: It was the sauce... 

To this day 2019, on my MAC Tower with 32 GB and six drives,  a Tyrannosaurus REX, An American Alligator and a Bald Eagle…  the natural evolution of the reptiles and development of the raptors,  the bald Eagle.  Believed to be between 144 million and 66 million years ago, during the Mesozoic era, the first birds began to evolve. Hard to believe they were related and not a cave man in sight!


Did the ice age keep the wings on ice?  I did a thirty minute standup class on dinosaurs to my classmates with the adults sitting in the back.  Standing ovation… The Dean was impressed, the Student Commissioner was impressed, my mother was impressed, my father smirked. He loved it. The teacher didn’t say a word.   She didn’t return next year.  The Dean said to me you love learning, you just hate school.


VINDICATION AND CONSEQUENCE
The Dean said he would give thought to consequence, not for the information I shared, he had not seen anything like it and not about my right to an opinion.  But my rudeness,  I was right for his beliefs but the schools had no policies on creationism and curriculum,  so both sides had to be explained.   A week later I got called into the Deans office.

My penitence, I had to apologize.  OK to get out of trouble, I apologized to the teacher only for the “ Crock Of Shit comment”.   My absolution was to do my Dino-Thesis in all the science classes, at the school.  He stopped short of shipping me to other schools, but it must have had crossed his mind and I did get to go with him to Erasmus Hall High School.   Truthfully, I loved doing and learning my work and the kids in the classes liked it too.  Little did I know, Neil Diamond, Jeff Chandler, Barbara Streisand, the Druckers, Lainie Kazan,  and others went to Erasmus Hall HS.

MORE RESEARCH INTO EVOLUTION 
Then I got into one-celled creatures and the real beginning of the earth formulation from t
he first living things on Earth, single-celled micro-organisms or microbes lacking a cell nucleus or cell membrane known as prokaryotes, seem to have first appeared on Earth almost four billion years ago, just a few hundred million years after the formation of the Earth itself.  It was college level work and basically they left me alone. The teacher on that level did work with me, we were of the same thoughts about science, Darwin and creationism being a religious module with little science to back it up.

I liked detention! I always carried my kind of good book in my schoolbag and met several nice girls in detention, I received more education, free typing when needed, and dates, more ways than one reading in detention.  Besides my science classes and shops, I learned more reading and life lessons in detention than in class or the street. 

My reading incorporated the works of JRR Tolkien, Lord of the Rings, Lord of the Flies, Brave New World,  Popular Mechanics, Thor Heyerdahl’s epic adventure Kon-Tiki, Fahrenheit 451, Popular Science, the  “Eight Wonders of the World”  travel series on the famous places in the world.  I searched anything, soft cover or hard about Aviation, the Military, Photography.  That was my world, my real world.

Michener was one of my favorite authors as he wrote episodic books, which translates through generations in one locale, sort of like Star Trek in differing temporal convergences in the spacetime continuum.  At twelve I had secured a book on Medicine from our pediatrician, and a copy of Greggs Anatomy, a couple of big books weighing more than me.  

It came in handy when I cut my pinky finger half off and sewed it back on again…My first surgery! yes it hurt and it was still better than telling my mother…

Being in detention allowed me to read and learn at my pace.  Detention teachers were rotated so some were curious and interested in what I was reading.  Some had read what I had read and were conversational about those books.  And what was I doing in detention was learning faster than in class. 
  

DECIMATED LEARNING THAT HAS GONE POLITICAL
A country less than two decades ago was first in the world in math and science and now we are 28th in the world.  I will always believe studying the past is relevant and the keys to the future.  Obviously others have moved forward and we have moved back.  With Betsy DeVos and Donald T-Rump, we will relegate ourselves and our future of our acceptance of lies, corruption and to mental mediocrity unless you are rich.

Today, I have had as many as seven website/blogs, participate in two very small business’s even in retirement, and have learned to write computer code, granted it’s Arduino and I can’t set my remote but could build a Nuke.  I carried a camera and notepad for better than 50 years.  I owned my own airplanes and I managed to fly 32 years, saved two planes while on fire, the passengers, and my buttocks on mechanical failures, and bouts with mother nature and learned one thing, self reliance.  

And have always said, “Have the right shoes for the path you choose, sometimes moccasins don’t cut it and you need boots, life can get very thick”, but the main point to remember regardless of your style in shoes, minefields are no place to tap dance.  


MASTER MACHINIST  -  IN METAL SHOP

As I mentioned, the wood and metal shops were my favorite engaged classes. Electronics I learned on my own from a study group in the military who called it “  Bomb School”.  I called it Bang-Bang-Oooops sung to the tune of Richey Vallens  “La Bomba”

I remember the first tools I made at Wingate in the metal shop on my own.  I learned to work with my hands with the resulting skills and ingenuity from the shop teacher.  We made worthless stuff for class projects but learned how to make useful stuff like ZIP guns, spears and knives after hours.

It allowed me with simple tools from my uncles shop to create new ideas.   Even today they still talk of the Jacobs Hubcap Remover, not sold in stores, available in Midnight Black and the Centennial version in silver powder coat only for $10.00 additional.  

You too can have a career in hubcap "restoration" for only $39.95. Make it back on your first job even if you only got the front ones! 

Our exclusive rear view mirror (not found on any of the competition) means you can get rid of your lookout and make more money.  No more splits with accomplices and with twin handles it allows faster retrieval with either hand when the hubcap springs loose and heavier than most. The mirror makes sure there are no onlookers behind you who might get hit with a flying hubcap.

Lifetime warranty against breakage or corroding unless you are in for life and you threw it in the Hudson.  The warranty is transferable to other hubcap collectors for only  $25.00.  Cash Only! 

It comes complete with instructions for both domestic and foreign jobs.   BUT WAIT! Order now and we’ll send you my new book “ Guide to the Great Bail Bondsmen of America” with a signed autograph by Joey Fonzini (who graduated early from San Quentin).  Joey still holds the record for HubCap retrieval. Fourteen sets in under 2 hours.  

2018 LATE BREAKING NOTE:
Joey made a killing selling over 100 sets of  hubcaps, till he snagged the caps from MM (Made Man) Joe “Broken Bones” Bonamachino’s Cadillac.  That was the last time we heard from or saw Joey but his MOM did receive a case of fine imported Italian sardines with a card from Mr. Bonamachino expressing his condolences at her loss.  She said the sardines were “ salty”, in water and not the brand she got from Don Vito Corleone in good Olive Oil.


CHAPTER FOUR

————*06-07-2019 aljacobsladder.com